Tips for What NOT To Say...

In a bar. It's wings night. My face is covered in blue cheese and chipotle bbq sauce.

Me, inebriated: "Lady, why aren't you having a drink?
Woman: "Oh, well, I don't drink."
Me, inebriated: "Don't drink? You don't drink? Why in the world would you do something like that?"
Woman: "Because I had a bad experience once. Some guys took advantage of me."
Me, inebriated: "Honey, what you call 'taking advantage of', I call 'good fortune'!"

Yeah, she didn't like that one very much. I wonder why?