Thursday, April 30, 2009

A Two-Year Old Post.

So I was going through my old blog and I found this from two years made me laugh, so I thought I'd share it :-)


Do you ever have a moment so magical the time just flies by? Do you ever have such a grand time that you are consumed with the moment? Are you ever so filled with joy and excitement for what you are doing that you never want it to end? Yeah, I'm not talking about that. Today, I'm talking about the absolute worst two hours of my life, where I literally was counting the seconds until it was over.

Today, I had my first Comparative Studies class. God was I in for torture. The class is called "Love in World Literature" and we turned in our first assignment, which was a paper on the meanings and manifestations of love (assigned via e-mail since we did not have class last week). Talk about a 9th grade orientation project. I have never in my life considered getting up and leaving a class because I thought I was actually losing knowledge. God was it a waste of time. For nearly two hours we went around the room and everyone chimed in on what they felt love was. I felt like I was in Self-loathers Anonymous. Everyone was like, "Love is a feeling" to which others would literally reply, "That's so deep." I had no idea I had signed up for a special ed circus of hippies, feminists and socialists discussing the "immense power" of four letter words. One girl literally said, "I am a Women's Studies Major, and I think love and girl should be interchangeable words, since love comes from the mother..." Can someone somehow hurt me so I have a medical excuse to NOT to attend this class?

The most mind-stabbing part of the session was when the Professor was discussing the semantics of the "profound statement" that "God is love". Some kid who is studying international studies (read: future Starbucks Barista), was like, "I consider love to be a prayer", to which the Professor squealed with delight at the inspiring revelation. They continued on for five minutes with a conversation similar to this:

"So, prayer is love?"
"Yes, and God is love."
"So then, would that mean that...prayer is God?"
"No, Prayer is communion with God, since a person who loves God will pray."
"I see! So those who love God will pray, since prayer is love and God is love?"
"Ah yes! However, love is an action, and God is a thing. Hence why prayer is not God."
"So then, love is both an action and a thing--but that would mean prayer is both a love and thing!"
"Ah, very true! So prayer is love, God is love, but love are both! Wonderful!"

FIVE FUCKING MINUTES OF THAT SPEWED DRIVEL. I cannot believe I have ten more weeks of this. I seriously have never been less challenged in my life. I think I'd find more challenge in old copy of Highlights Magazine. (Remember that shit? THE BEST). And, since I always sit in the front row, it's not like I could pull out some homework and just ignore the silly words that were being exchanged. "Love is the fuel to propel the world", that is a literal quote. We talked about it for ten minutes.

*pulls hair out in utmost agony*